HELP!

So I don’t want to do this low carb thing anymore. It was nice while it lasted but my body has had enough! I just had a ton or carbs. It wasn’t a binge or anything. Well I had about 500 cals for dinner. Which is usually what I have all day. But I had to eat with the family, and I didn’t want them to think anything’s wrong with me. Anyways I’ve been doing so well I deserve to indulge a bit. I don’t know if ya’ll know this. But I LOVE food. I’ve C & S about 1,200 calories of cookies and chocolate in the last 12 hours. Which is a bit of a problem. But I hate purging. I’d rather just spit.

ANYWAYS. What diet should I start? I’m thinking ABC with my Ana Buddy? She starts tomorrow. What do you guys think?! Thankssss.

XoXo Sarah

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So I decided I’m going to continue my modified Atkins diet program. At least through Saturday. It’s just easy to stick to and it’s easy for me to plan meals. Wednesday I’ll fast. Thursday I’ll most likely pig out. Friday I’ll fast and everything should go fine. If I can’t fast those days, I plan on keeping it under 150 cals, with minimal carbs. Probably some lean turkey or chicken with lettuce and vinegar. I’ll probably keep it like that until all of our leftover turkey is gone actually. Idk. We’ll see how things unfold.

An hour or so after eating dinner I decided I’d let myself have a few pretzels. Within seconds of opening the bag Daddy Dearest says, “What.. did you not have enough for dinner or something?!” ok, asshole. I. Am. Hungry. Fuck. Off. K bye.

My [pretty bad] intake of the day:

B: Broccoli (62)
L: Buffalo Chicken Salad (141)
D: Whole Wheat Pasta, Salmon, Corn, Sweet Potato, Mozzarella & 5 Pretzels (686)

Burned Off: 209
Net Carbs: 95 =/

New Header (:

Check it out. I look gap toothed, I'm not I swear, it was just the lighting I guess.. I'll take better pics soon.

So I’m on the phone with Eddie. He makes me so happy. I’m all smiles right now. And before he called me I was in a very bad mood. I was thinking about cutting a lot today. Suicidal thoughts, the whole kit and caboodle (spl?). Honestly if I wasn’t doing so well restricting my cals and carbs I probably would’ve done something. Control is the only thing keeping me going right now. I have bruises on the back of my arms from when Daddy Dearest grabbed me. I told Eddie this. This is the first time I’ve ever told anyone about anything personal. I told him about the whole fight. He didn’t really say anything about it; then again what’s he supposed to say. I’m just glad he was there to listen. He told me how he has really strong feelings for me, even though he has a girlfriend. The fact that I’m only 17 really gets to him though. He’s 22. But he’s such a sweet guy. Sometimes I wish we were together. I don’t think it would work though. He’s been with two of my best friends (they’re 21) and idk it would just be weird. Anyways he makes me happy. (:


I stuck to the plan today with the food and all. Work was alright. I burned about 400 cals which is good. T wasn’t a complete ass either. Just a partial ass.

What DID piss me off today was that my brother took my laptop up to St. Louis Bread Co. (Panera for you guys not in the STL.. idk why it’s called that.. maybe it was made here?) and HELLO…?! ALL of my ED stuff is on here. Half of your blogs are on my favorites tabs, mine included. It could have been hell had he gone on my account rather than the guest one. I found out he was on it because a friend of mine saw him at Bread Co with it.. and she texted me. My brother’s gonna get an earful and a half tomorrow.

Tomorrows Plan:

B: Same as today (296)

L: Tuna w/ light sour cream and lettuce (225)

D: Chicken and Broccoli (168)

Total of (689) 15 net carbs.

Winter Girls

I read Winter Girls yesterday. Thanks to Lou who somehow found the whole copy online?! THANK YOU, it was one of the best reads so far! I stayed up until about 3 AM just so I could finish it. Hence the reason why I didn’t post last night, didn’t do my homework, and didn’t work out! :( Also the reason I am posting now.. while I should be in school. I told my dad I had a headache.. I mean there’s nothing he can really do. He can’t force me to go to school. He said he wouldn’t call me out and excuse my absence. But he will. I have to drive him to Westport today, which is about 45 minutes away from my cozy warm bed. So I’ll be sure of it that he calls me out. Even if he doesn’t, that’s what I have so many older friends for who can pull of a mom voice just wonderfully.


Yesterday my intake ended up at (589) with only 11 net carbs!! Almost half of what I was aiming for!! (: still.. the cals were a bit higher then I wanted, but I’m really just trying for the carb intake. Dr. Atkins has given me some promising result expectations, so they better hold up.

Today’s Intake is already planned out:

B: Egg Omelet with green beans, onions, broccoli, and chicken (296)
L: Tea w/ Splenda, Water (0)
D: Subway Steak Salad (240)

Net Carbs?... 18!

Hope your day goes well loves!

~XX SARAH

Thinspo of the day: Nicky Hilton